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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28880025">everything stays (but it still changes)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/deoksun/pseuds/deoksun'>deoksun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Not Beta Read, Pining Tsukishima Kei, Post-Time Skip, Self-Indulgent, Single Dad Yamaguchi Tadashi, Yearning, and he's trying his best to become the best dad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 07:47:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,534</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28880025</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/deoksun/pseuds/deoksun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Tsukishima and Yamaguchi haven't seen each other in four years, so Tsukishima definitely didn't expect the latter to show up in their high school reunion with a child that looks exactly like Yamaguchi did when they first met.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi, Yachi Hitoka &amp; Yamaguchi Tadashi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>everything stays (but it still changes)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Let's go in the garden<br/>You'll find something waiting<br/>Right there where you left it lying upside down<br/>When you finally find it, you'll see how it's faded<br/>The underside is lighter when you turn it around</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hey, Tsukishima!” </p><p>Tsukishima winced, pulling his phone a few inches away from his ear. Unfortunately, he could still hear Hinata’s voice. He knew he would regret answering his phone the moment he woke up because really, who would be brave enough to call Tsukishima at 6 AM on a <em> Sunday </em>? Of course, it would be Hinata. Unfortunately, he was too sleepy to even think about it and yes, he did not save Hinata’s new number the moment he texted everyone about it. He did not have any plan to contact him soon, anyway. </p><p>“Tsukishima,” he repeated, still as energetic as ever. The blonde wondered where he got so much energy at an early hour. </p><p>He grabbed his glasses from the nightstand. “What the fuck do you want, Shrimp?”</p><p>“I don’t think that’s a nice way to greet someone you haven’t talked to in years.”</p><p>“I don’t think screaming their name the moment they picked up their phone isn’t a nice way either, Shrimp.”</p><p>Tsukishima stood up, his feet immediately finding comfort on his white house slippers. “You’re still as mean as ever,” the other line said, and the taller could not help but snort at the remark. </p><p>“And you’re still as energetic. Why did you call? I don’t have all day to catch up so speak,” he stated as he made his way down the stairs and to the kitchen. His mom was there, and the smell of coffee filled their warm morning. He gave her a small smile and she replied with a similar one, handing her youngest son a cup. </p><p>Hinata whined. “Daichi-san told me you’re not coming! I’ll be there, aren’t you excited to see me?”</p><p>“Why would I be?” he takes a sip,  “plus, I don’t think it fits in my schedule.”</p><p>The idea was nice, he thought. But he was sure he did not have the time to go when he had to take care of an exhibition and scheduled extra hours of volleyball practice with Sendai Frogs. One of the things that did not change since high school was the fact that he hated getting drained, after all. </p><p>So the moment he saw Daichi’s email about their team’s reunion, he was certain to say no, replying to his senior’s email in the most polite way possible.</p><p>Apparently, Hinata can’t take no for an answer. </p><p>“You’re going - you need to go! Everyone will be there. Even Yamaguchi said yes.”</p><p>Tsukishima’s cup lands at their kitchen counter. It spilled a few drops of coffee and the sudden, loud sound made his mom worriedly glance in his direction. He nodded at her as an apology and hoped Hinata did not hear it.</p><p>“Yamaguchi’s going to be there?” he whispered enough for his mom not to hear. </p><p>“Yeah! He said he’s going to bring someone and he was really excited over the phone. I’m guessing it’s his girlfriend. You could bring your friends too!”</p><p>“Fine.”</p><p>“Fine- fine what?”</p><p>“Fine,” he sighed, “I’ll be there.”</p><p>He’ll be there, even though his heart almost dropped at the thought of seeing his best friend with someone else, almost four years since they stopped communicating. </p><p>It took him a mention of his best friend’s name. <em> A mention! Hinata did not even have to say his name twice! </em>He felt pathetic, so the minute he finished his coffee and washed his cup, he made his way back to his room and dropped his body to the bed.</p><p>His room did not change much. It’s almost the same as it was back in his days as Karasuno’s middle blocker. There were still dinosaur figurines at the top of his shelf and below them were encyclopedias, almanacs, and novels that collected dust over the years they were untouched. He removed his Jurassic Park poster some time during college and replaced it with a calendar that had enough space for him to write notes on. The glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling were gone, he threw them out during his college sophomore year. He hated seeing them in the middle of the night the moment he’d lean back his chair out of frustration with the overwhelming amount of papers he had to finish. The stars that used to be in his ceiling -- the stars in general -- would eventually turn into someone’s freckles the moment he closed his eyes. Stars reminded him so much of someone very, very special. Someone who sat silently in both Tsukishima’s contact list and nightstand’s drawer. </p><p>Someone, he was hopefully going to see soon. And, <em> hopefully </em> , his heart was not going to sink the moment he saw him doing amazing with somebody else <em> . </em>Because the feeling in his chest was heavy while the empty ceiling stared back at him, the marks of the stars were still evident if he squinted hard enough. </p><p>He hated the sinking feeling so much, and he was so scared to feel it become worse but he still said yes.</p><p>Of course, it was always going to be a yes when it comes to Yamaguchi Tadashi.</p><p>-</p><p>Yamaguchi folded his daughter’s favorite pajamas neatly, smiling at its strawberry pattern. It’s the last pair of clothes he needed to pack for Mizuki’s side of their suitcase, and there were three boxes yet to be filled before Yamaguchi could say that they were actually ready to move back to Miyagi.</p><p>“She’s asleep,” said Yachi, making sure that she did not make a sound when she shut the door.</p><p>“Is everything settled with your company?” she asked. She had been helping Yamaguchi to check on things, and these days she’s been acting as if she was his mom. </p><p>He took a few seconds to run through a checklist on his head, thinking about all the things he did during the month he spent preparing. “They’re still working on it. My boss said it really isn’t easy to move to another branch, but he’d probably get it done in a few days since the Miyagi branch needs me, anyway.” </p><p>“Are you sure you’re going? I mean, to the reunion. You know I can give them another excuse.”</p><p>“Yeah. I thought about it for a while now. I think I’m ready to let them meet Mizu. Plus, I don’t think they’d buy any of our excuses anymore, and it’s just in time with the fact that we’re moving back to Miyagi.”</p><p>Yachi nodded. She sat right beside him, the feeling of Yamaguchi’s living room carpet sending her warmth underneath her fingertips. He was right. He had been planning to move back to Miyagi for months now. An apartment was already waiting for them, and they knew that the high school reunion was about to be scheduled for the year. They just didn’t know that it would be that soon. “I’m sure they’ll love her. Everyone does.” </p><p>The silence with Yachi was always comforting for Yamaguchi. It reminded him that someone is always going to be there for him when things get too heavy with Mizuki. Having a kid was not a piece of cake, essentially, and he was still trying his best to be financially stable enough to provide for Mizuki’s daily needs. </p><p>He was so, so glad to have Yachi around. He remembered it-- the day it was announced to him. Yachi was sitting on the exact same carpet of Yamaguchi’s small apartment, trying to accomplish an essay that was due the same day. She watched Yamaguchi open the door to reveal someone completely unfamiliar to her -- she’s taller than Yachi but definitely smaller than Yamaguchi. Despite the evidence of how nervous she was, she stood tall, her strawberry blonde hair tied into a neat ponytail. Yachi saw the panic in her eyes when she glanced in her direction but did not think about it too much. </p><p>“Hey,” she bit the inside of her left cheek, “I’m glad I got the address correct. Can I- uh, can I come in? If it’s not much of a bother.”</p><p>He remembered her. Saito Isamu, someone he would often see at parties, and someone he talked to a lot during one of his elective classes. </p><p>Yamaguchi smiled warmly, and it surprisingly made the room’s atmosphere lighter. “Isamu, hey. Sure thing.”</p><p>Yachi stood up, dusting off her skirt with the palms of her hands. She tried to offer her a smile while Isamu -- at least, according to Yamaguchi -- nodded.</p><p>“I’ll get you guys coffee.”</p><p>“Thanks, Yachi.”</p><p>Well, first and foremost, Yamaguchi’s apartment was pretty small. Especially since it was only meant for one person. So when Yachi went to his kitchen to prepare two cups of coffee, it would not be her mistake to overhear their conversation. </p><p>She heard Isamu sigh from the living room. “Yamaguchi-kun, this is a lot to take in, okay? And I know it’s been two months since that night happened but I don’t know how else to say it. You deserve to know.”</p><p>Yachi already knew where it was going, but she still took every second of the silence to hope that it wasn’t what she thought it was going to be. </p><p>Her best friend’s not ready. Especially when Yamaguchi, an only child in an Asian household, had everything in his life planned. </p><p>Isamu held his hand at the coffee table, giving it a light squeeze. </p><p>“I’m pregnant with your child, Yamaguchi.”</p><p>He had everything in his life planned. He got into his dream university, check. He hasn’t disappointed himself with his grades yet, check. He got into college parties, socialized a little, and made new friends, check. </p><p>All that's left for his college life was to get his thesis approved and graduate. There was no space for a kid. He never thought about having one, ever. Not when he realized that he was not really into committed relationships at the moment. Not now. </p><p>Getting someone pregnant was not on the list.</p><p>Yachi stopped stirring their coffee. Yamaguchi was shaking, it was evident in his breathing. Underneath Isamu’s hold was Yamaguchi’s knuckles turning white.</p><p>They were all scared.</p><p>“I, uh," Yamaguchi faltered, "what's your plan?"</p><p>“I don’t know.” Isamu chewed the inside of her cheek. They did not know when they started crying, but now Isamu had her head in her hands and Yamaguchi was trying so hard to think about what was going to happen next. </p><p>“My parents would disown me, Yamaguchi. If I decide to abort it but I have so many things ahead of me, you know? You’re going to be in your third year next year and I just got into law school. It’s all so sudden and I'm so, so sorry.” Isamu managed to say while she was not shaking too much so the words could come across clearly. </p><p>That was probably the only time where the silence in Yamaguchi’s apartment was uncomfortable and heavy. There was a fleeting feeling of anxiety, of dreams holding on to something uncertain. Everyone’s breathing was uneven and full of hesitance. They did not know where to look, and everything about the apartment seemed so suffocating. </p><p>Yamaguchi was always brave to Yachi’s eyes. He was always so determined to become a better person. Everyone knew about how hard he worked on whatever aspect. He never failed in class and he never disrespected his parents. He scored a lot of points for the team and even led them to the nationals in his last year of high school. He got into an amazing university and was always on the dean’s list. No one remembers the seven-year-old Yamaguchi Tadashi who got pushed and hovered on by three boys of the same age. He was always so strong. </p><p>“I’ll take care of it.”</p><p>He was always brave.</p><p>Yachi was there when Isamu and Yamaguchi tried to work things out. It was an idea, really. They thought about actually getting together and putting romance between them, but it never worked out, even during the time they spent together. Yamaguchi had to juggle two part-time jobs and his college life, Yachi had no idea how he did it. Sometimes he would break down at night and Yachi would be there to listen to him rant about how he thinks he disappointed his parents. She listened to him cry over how scared he is, because <em> Yachi, what if I can’t do it? </em></p><p>When Mizuki was born, Yachi watched her best friend flash the brightest, most sincere smile as he cradled his child for the first time. Isamu watched them with tired yet contented eyes. They all cried, they all forgot about everything else at that very moment. </p><p>“You’re going to be an amazing dad, Yamaguchi,” she said, like a promise. Yachi knew she will never be wrong about it because doing his best for the people he loves is one thing that Yamaguchi’s good at.</p><p>“I’m going to <em> try. </em>”</p><p>Isamu moved into Yamaguchi’s apartment a week after she gave birth to their child. She stayed in the bedroom with their child while Yamaguchi had a futon in his living room. The cradle and Isamu’s things took up too much space in his room that it was something easy to decide on.</p><p>Yamaguchi’s apartment was small, but it was also enough for them. Isamu was a good cook and a good mother. While Yamaguchi had to busy himself with jobs and school work, Isamu took a year off to take care of their daughter and prepare meals for them. </p><p>Mizuki was a year old when Isamu decided to move out and Yamaguchi didn’t know if he was supposed to be heartbroken. They were never in a relationship -- had nothing to connect them aside from the child quietly sleeping in Yamaguchi’s bedroom. </p><p>Yamaguchi is his own person. A college student who was about to graduate in a few months, a son who promised to renovate his family’s house when he got into his dream university with his dream college program. He was a father, a best friend, a voter. Isamu is her own person, too. She’s not just the mother of Yamaguchi’s child.</p><p>“Yamaguchi, I hope you understand. I love her so much, you know? She’s my kid. I carried her for nine months,” she chuckled. “I love her. I love you, too, and I appreciate everything you have done for this to work out. But this isn’t how I want to spend my whole life.</p><p>“I wouldn’t turn my back on my responsibility as Mizuki’s mother but I hope you understand where I’m coming from. I spent the whole year in this apartment trying to take care of her and you know I can do more than that, right?”</p><p>Yamaguchi nodded. </p><p>“I applied for law school again. I’m sorry I had to put most of the responsibility on you but-”</p><p>“Hey, Isamu, it’s okay. I already told you, right? I’ll take care of her. And I trust you. I know you love her. I understand.”</p><p>Yamaguchi was always brave and even Isamu saw that. She considered herself very lucky and grateful for that. She knew one day, Mizuki would see that too.</p><p>Isamu visits every month and Yamaguchi would give them a few days to spend time with each other. When things would get busy for her in law school, she would ask Yamaguchi for pictures of their child and he was always excited to talk about every adorable thing she would do. </p><p>Yamaguchi’s mom lived with him when Isamu finally moved out of their apartment. It was something they were positive about, and Yamaguchi had to admit he needed help. At least until he graduates.</p><p>“She’s just like you,” she said, eyes looking fondly at the freckled one-year-old who was too occupied on the new set of animal flashcards. </p><p>Yamaguchi smiled at the scene, the back of his hand wiping off the sweat he got from moving his mother’s things out of the car. </p><p>“She’s smarter than me, though. Probably got it from her mom.”</p><p>Yachi, who just entered the room holding boxes from Mrs. Yamaguchi’s car, snickered. “Says the one who managed to graduate in computer science while taking care of a literal child.”</p><p>“It’s because I have you guys!” he jokingly said, afraid it would be too cheesy to take in. Yachi laughed at it anyway. </p><p>When Yachi looks back at everything, she wouldn’t deny that a lot of things changed with Yamaguchi. It was like Mizuki eventually became his world. Unlike Isamu, Yamaguchi decided to give every part of him to his daughter like she was the reason for his existence. He rarely went out to parties and socialized after everything and the fact that his world became twice busier. Although he was never embarrassed by his daughter, he was still afraid of the judgments and the possibility of his daughter having to deal with it. </p><p>“Hinata just texted me. Tsukishima’s coming for the first time in years. I bet he’s excited to see you.”</p><p>Tsukishima. His best friend.</p><p>The person he longed for during his first years in Tokyo. The person who occupied his thoughts when Mizuki had not existed yet to do so. </p><p>He definitely missed thinking about him. </p><p>“Well, it’s the same thing with me. I hope he doesn’t get too shocked with Mizuki.”</p><p>Yachi sighed. “I think it’s going to be hard for him, Yamaguchi. You were his best friend, and you know how much he hates it when people hide things from him.”</p><p>“But he’ll understand. It’s you.”</p><p>-</p><p>“Tadashi,” Tsukishima mumbled on the phone. Yamaguchi was still busy on his paper while Isamu was sleeping quietly in his room with a two-month-old child. He pushed his back against the swivel chair to stop and stare at the frames on his desk. One was a picture of him with his parents during his high school graduation while the other was his first picture with the Karasuno Volleyball Team. A small picture of him and Tsukishima during middle school was there too, placed at the bottom left of his picture with Karasuno, blocking their Coach Ukai and Daichi’s bodies. Two shy boys -- one with the biggest smile on his face, the other with a small one while looking at somewhere that was not the camera. </p><p>It’s been two weeks since they last talked to each other, casually updating on what was up and how hard college had been for the both of them. Yamaguchi hasn’t told Tsukishima about Mizuki yet -- he could not bring himself to do so, and every time the blonde would call he’d fail to swallow a lump down his throat out of guilt. </p><p>He did not have any idea why he could not tell him. He was his best friend and their friendship was deeper than what he has with Isamu and Yachi. Yamaguchi thinks that it could be a reason.</p><p>Or that he would not want to burden other people anymore. He did not want to feel pitied. He accepted Mizuki as his and Isamu’s responsibility. His and Isamu’s only. Not Yachi nor Yamaguchi’s mom. Definitely not Tsukishima’s. </p><p>“Tadashi, are you there?” </p><p>“Yes, and you’re drunk.”</p><p>“I’m not.”</p><p>Yamaguchi laughs at that, the guilt in his stomach slowly disappearing. “You are drunk, Tsukki. You should rest.”</p><p>Yamaguchi continued to type on his laptop, carefully placing his phone between his shoulder and his ear so he could carefully hear his best friend.</p><p>“I miss you.”</p><p>And there was something about those three words that made Yamaguchi’s world stop. He sighed, breath hitching, eyes glancing from his laptop to one of the pictures on his desk.</p><p>The call dropped.</p><p>“I miss you too.”</p><p>Those words were not supposed to mean anything deeper than they were formed for. Best friends are allowed to miss each other, let alone the fact that they had been friends since middle school. But it came from Tsukishima Kei.</p><p>They were not supposed to mean anything deeper, but everything stopped at those three words, including their communication. Tsukishima did not answer his calls nor replied to his texts, and eventually, everything died down. Yamaguchi was too busy. Tsukishima had no idea how to bring them back. </p><p>Now, Mizuki is three. It’s going to be her first time in Miyagi and her first time to meet her father’s childhood best friend. </p><p>Yamaguchi pulled the pink scrunchie off his wrist then held his daughter’s shoulders and faced her away from him. He quickly braided her strawberry blonde hair, something Isamu taught him once because Mizuki liked to look pretty.</p><p>“Do you think they’ll like Mizuki?” Mizuki asked her father, pouting. Yamaguchi looked at her with the biggest smile on his face-- a smile just for her, and Mizuki thinks that it looked exactly like the boy from one of the pictures her Aunt Yachi showed her while she was helping Yamaguchi pack.</p><p>There was another kid in that picture. Mizuki remembered him as the one with glasses and a nickname similar to hers. When she asked about it, Aunt Yachi said he was someone really special to her dad. </p><p>Yamaguchi carried his child and gave her a kiss on her forehead. “Of course! Who wouldn’t like you, sweetheart?”</p><p>“I’m finally going to meet your friends!” she hugs him tight. </p><p>“You’re going to surprise them.” A lot, actually, Yamaguchi wanted to add.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello! I haven't written in years but I feel like I need to write something for this couple especially since they've been keeping me sane for a while now. Plus, there aren't a lot of kid fics for tskym so I thought about giving this storyline a try. Anyway, this was pretty rusty and the whole fic's self-indulgent. I don't have anyone to beta it but I still hope you enjoyed it! ♥︎ I'm still working on the next two chapters and I hope I get to post them soon.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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